Anxiety, Escapism, and the Hum

May 2023

A short essay about Ted Chiang’s The Great Silence

      Sometimes, if it's really quiet, you can hear the sound of your own heartbeat. I find it to mimic what some people call ‘the hum of the universe’. Those people may also say that we are one with it, our bodies are made up of the molecules of space, stardust and all. We may just be the universe experiencing its own self, or a creation of a higher being for its own pleasure, or even just a random chance in an open plane of emptiness. All these possibilities seem frighting in someway, but if you let them take you, they will hold you close and protect you from yourself. I had never really thought about anything beyond the biblical perspective when I was a child. It was always just one answer: God made you, his son died for your sins, and you fear them both until you die; you might even enjoy a blissful eternity if you listen to His words. Maybe that Hum would exist there too. The first time I thought about a Hum was when my grandmother passed away. She had an open casket, and I saw my mom cry for the first time. They both looked so empty. My mother was ridden with sorrow and we stopped going to church, however my sister and I would still attend a catholic church at school. My relationship with religious spirituality slowly started to be questioned. Around the time of my grandmother’s death, my fourth grade class was lining up to go to church one fall morning in 2013. I started to feel queasy, and ended up throwing up in front of the class. My mom picked me up and took care of me at home. When I returned the following day, it happened again. It happened again and again until I was missing school for about a month. They weren't sure what was wrong with me, one of my devout nun teachers thought I was possessed, my classmates thought I was gross and ill with some crazy disease, and I went to doctor after doctor. I once went through a CAT scan; this time I really heard a Hum. Not just the whirring of the machine, but I was frightened yet content. I thought about God, my mom, and what might happen to me. After the CAT scan, they said nothing was wrong, I was just really anxious. As years went on, I had multiple therapists and medications. Each year that went by I realized I could explore outside of the religious perspective, and find comfort in thinking about the universe. Ted Chiang’s The Great Silence really put in perspective some of the connotations of my thinking, though. He was right, why look out when there's so many possibilities here? Everything you need or want is on the ground, and it needs you too. However, in the smaller scheme of things, I think that curiosity is the most important strength for humans. Always wanting to know more has brought us so far. Being curious gives us meaning. As someone who suffers with a general anxiety disorder, I found that the message in “The Great Silence” fails to acknowledge the benefits of human escapism and how it appeases mental health. 

      In my experience, I have found that the idea of an undiscovered reality can ease my anxiety. I have always found comfort in distracting myself with things beyond my minor struggles and anxieties. I’m always trying to find ways to escape it. “Escapisms may reduce illness anxiety disorder; this is because escapism takes your mind off the worry of the moment; instead of worrying excessively that you may become seriously ill, you can divert your mind into something more pleasing.” This quote is from an educational psychology page. While this is pretty much common sense, it is still very true.  The Great Silence says that humans have a strong desire to make a connection to something beyond our earth but the parrot states, “I and my fellow parrots are right here. Why aren’t they interested in listening to our voices?”.  This hypothetical parrot acknowledges how innate simple curiosity is to humans, by mentioning it isn't really our fault and that we weren't paying attention. However it doesn't mention the health and spiritual benefactors within it. I think temporary acknowledgement that these worldly problems are much more miniscule than we think takes off the pressure, and most of the time concepts such as deforestation are not the average Joe’s fault, considering the mega corporations that will destroy anything for greed. I find myself watching videos surrounding the questioning before bed to calm my mind. Most of the media I like to consume consists of questioning the universe and understanding the “why” and “how” of it all. I’ve always been intrigued by human’s constant curiosity. As Niel deGrasse Tyson said, (something along the lines of) humans are escape artists, always looking for something new to inhabit or experience. On that note, I encourage you to watch both Cosmos series hosted by him. I think questioning is as close as you can get to the Hum, the totality of our existence and any other form of life. 

      Another example that could contradict the damages of escapism is Religion. While I’ve had a rocky relationship with religious spirituality, I still found it to be a comforting example of escapism at some point in my life, and I’m sure it is for millions of people on earth. Religion has been used as a method of escapism for thousands of years, it too questions the Hum. The idea that someone is out there protecting us from evil and negativity is a warming feeling that can ease the mind. I found that others agree. “Even the spiritual path is a form of escapism, especially when it is used to bypass painful elements of life and sugar coat them with fanciful ideas.” There were many times when I was younger where I had prayed for things to change. I prayed that I would stop throwing up, that my mom would be happier, and that He was real. At the time it worked, but like most methods of escapism it faded and I lost hope.  Those small moments were like a phone call to the Hum in my mind. I would always end a prayer by saying, “ say hi to Mimi for me,” in hopes that God was hanging out with my grandmother on a soft cloud in the sky. There are even times now where I pray just in case I’m wrong about what's out there. A line that stood out to me in The Great Silence was, “Their desire to make a connection is so strong that they’ve created an ear capable of hearing across the universe”. It struck me because of its connection to what might be human greed, at least in their tone. I think of this as greed in the way that through our innate curiosity we want everything, and will look out beyond our world for something new to conquer or learn. I find it to be more pitiful. We are hoping for something more significant beyond what we have created for ourselves. We’ve convinced ourselves there is something we are leading up to, an eternity of love and bliss if we follow the rules. When we look out, we are looking for ourselves. The Hum may come from within like a heartbeat, and surround our world into the depths of space. 

          Space exploration is a more literal act of escapism, and I have learned that educating myself on that subject can ease the mind. Curiosity has become such a comfort to ourselves that we've dedicated billions of dollars to the research of the Hum. I found a book published by NASA titled, Archeology, Anthropology, and Interstellar Connection by Douglas Vakoch. It basically covers the historical and modern ideas that go into interstellar research, and also mentions human escapism and what that might mean. It delves into the human desire of self awareness and the captivation of our own existence. Vakoch goes on to mention, “Ample evidence suggests that people seek to inform future generations about their lives, times, and accomplishments. Earth is sprinkled liberally with time capsules, monuments, tombstones, and other tributes to ego, achievement, and in some cases folly” (Vakoch, pg 173). The natural desire to expand and further the evolution of our own species can be seen as quite self fulfilling and selfish when it's at the expense of other living creatures, but we have learned that documentation and exploration has opened new doors when it comes to helping our planet. That gratification may be a form of escapism, but in turn it benefits both our mental health as well as using that education to better the planet. Carl Sagan wrote, ‘For those who have something they consider worthwhile, communication to the future is an almost irresistible temptation… In the best of cases it is an optimistic and far-seeing act; it expresses great hope for the future; it time-binds the human community; it gives us a perspective on the significance of our own actions at this moment in the long historical journey of our species.’ There is dopamine that derives from the acknowledgement of our own kind, knowing the way we onced lived or might live in the future. Time has its own meaning to us and exists in the vacuum of space and the Hum itself.  I believe that the Hum can exist in anything that brings us joy and comfort. The universe created us and is therefore within us. 

      Ted Chiang’s The Great Silence has many good points regarding the impact of humans' escapist mindset and innate nature on the planet, however through experience I've learned that certain escapist coping strategies have helped me deal with my anxiety disorder without harming the earth. I believe the investigation of life on earth and the curiosity of life beyond us are capable of coexisting. The Hum can exist internally and externally.

Bibliography

 Innocent, Ada. “The Psychology of Escapism: A Coping Technique or a Sinking Ship? - Terraskills - Professional Training in Abuja: Skills to Excel.” Terraskills, 25 Mar. 2021, https://terraskills.com/the-psychology-of-escapism-a-coping-technique-or-a-sinking-ship/#:~:text=Escapisms%20may%20reduce%20illness%20anxiety,mind%20into%20something%20more%20pleasing. 

 Aletheia. “Are You Addicted to Spiritual Escapism?” LonerWolf, 28 Jan. 2022, https://lonerwolf.com/spiritual-escapism/. 

 Chiang, Ted. “The Great Silence .” Exhalation, Thorndike Press Large Print, 2019. 

 Vakoch, Douglas A. NASA, 2014. https://www.nasa.gov/sites/default/files/files/Archaeology_Anthropology_and_Interstellar_Communication_TAGGED.pdf

 Carl Sagan, Murmurs of Earth (New York: Random House, 1978), quoted here from Douglas A. Vakoch, "Across Generations: SETI Looks to the Future," Space.com, 10 April 2003, http:// archive.set.org/set/projects/mc/articles/xc_generations.php (accessed 29 April 2012).